When you ask your bridal party, make sure you set expectations from the beginning. You definitely want to be upfront with them about any kind of cost or time obligations. So, what should you expect? Let’s talk about it!



There are a lot of events associated with a wedding, aside from the wedding itself. If you do an engagement party there’s that, there’s a bridal shower (or showers!), the bachelorette/bachelor party, rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, and maybe an after wedding brunch. Decide what you absolutely want your bridesmaids or groomsmen at and let them know. Try to be understanding that attending each event takes time and, often, money. 


The rehearsal and rehearsal dinner are usually a given but make that known. If it’s crucial all your bridesmaids are at your bachelorette party, make that known up front too. Just make sure you are flexible on the scheduling, so you can pick a date everyone is available!


If you already know you are going to have more than one bridal shower, let your ladies know. If there’s one that is more important to you, let them know so they can plan accordingly.


If you choose a lot of out of town bridal party members and plan for a lot of these events to be in your town, keep that in mind. It can be hard for people to keep taking off work and paying for travel, so if attendance is a deal breaker for you, consider you bridal party members carefully. 



It’s not just expensive to throw a wedding, it’s expensive to be in a wedding, too! There are certain things bridal party members will already know they should expect to pay for. Things like their dress or suit and their travel to and from events. But if your expectation is that all the ladies should have hair and makeup done and pay for it themselves, make that clear.


Planning Assistance

Your bridal party members are you go-to people, even before all this wedding planning, so why shouldn’t they still be your go to people during all the wedding planning? It’s definitely okay to expect your bridal party members to be there to help you before the big day – and on the big day! Rely on your bridal party to help you with things like stuffing welcome bags, unloading boxes from the car to the venue, putting stickers on your favors, going wedding dress or tux shopping with you – you get the point. Just remember they aren’t your wedding vendors and they aren’t your personal assistant. You probably shouldn’t ask them to lay your linens or pick up your dress! Be reasonable and remember, these people are your personal VIPs so treat them with love.


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Photo Courtesy of Traine